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Tuesday, November 17, 2009

...it's Fall!

Everyday I have something to blog about, but I get so busy, I don't. I write my blog everynight in my head as I try to fall asleep. So many things on my mind. Things I want to share.

Ryan and I still have not come up with a custody agreement...so we are just playing it by ear right now. He hasn't had them since Halloween. He has requested to have them next week. It makes sense. They don't have school and I work. He doesn't work and neither does his mom...so together they can entertain the kids. I imagine my nephew you will also be off from school, so playing with him will be fun for the kids as well.
I'm not a big fan of Thanksgiving. Mostly because I come from such a small family that when we have family get togethers its with the people I see almost on a daily basis. It also doesn't help that I am a vegetarian and that leaves me a meal of green beans and mashed potatoes. For some reason the other night after Ryan and I finalized plans, I laid in bed and it hit me that I was going to be w/o my kids on a holiday. I don't even care abou t the holiday...but it just felt weird. I cannot celebrate Thanksgiving this year. Not that I"m not thankful...because I'm extremely thankful for so many things. Ironically my children are native americans...so I suppose it's their holiday r ight? Anyway, I'm going to take a day to myself I guess (unless anyone wants to come over and kee p me company....movies & wine???)
On another note, I would love to become a photographer one day. Family, kids and babies. I have done a couple of photoshoots with my friend and I've been happy with what I have done so far. I'm still not up to caliber...and I hope with pra ctice I will be. Mostly I take a good image...it's j ust not exposed properly...and thankfully I'm pretty decent in photoshop which fixes all that. But I'd like to get it right w/o photoshopping. So I decided that since next week I'm free and it's close to family pictures time for Christmas cards, I'd offer in invitation to you to help us both.

So I'm offering to you a 1hr sessi

on on location (probably at Caldwell Park), 2 Photo Christmas card designs and a CD with Images from the shoot (photoshop touchup included) for $30. Let me know if you are interested :)


....and Happy Thanksgiving!

Some samples below :)

Friday, October 9, 2009

to blog or not to blog...

I'm feeling the need to blog. Hmmm, about what? Dunno! Well let's see what random thoughts escape my mind. This weekend..pack up kids' bedroom (maybe put primer on the walls), sell stuff (shhh, some will be kids toys). Christmas cards? What? already...yep. I know I'll get behind if I don't...really we all know it's sneaky up on us. Christmas? hmmm...what should I get my kids? Thinking that the son's request for Heely's may finally come true. He's been asking for 2 years...his poor feet have been too small. Kendall...hmmm, hate to get her more toys...girl has a million My little ponies and Barbies.....and dress up and games....hmmm. Do you think she'd like ??? damn, can't think....what do you think a 5 year old girl might "need"...lol, like they need anything...maybe chocolate chip pancakes.
Halloween...Love it!
Thanksgiving...vegitarian...lame!
Christmas...hmmm, well like to watch my kids
Birthday...Jaunary...make me feel special
February...Valentine's day...hmmm, no one seems to want to celebrate that with me (maybe this year?)
and then.....headed towards summer again...wow, time flies!

okay...see ya (will I?...hear yah?...maybe just read ya)....comment me..please ;)

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Nobody reads this

nobody reads this, reads this, reads this...nobody reads this, not they don't ! ;)

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Kid's Birthday Party

For a planner, I wasn't planning very well when I had my kids 3 weeks apart. Kendall's birthday is in September and Joey's in October. The first year we obviously wanted to keep them separate. She would need her special 1st birthday party and Joey would need something special as well since this was the first time he had to deal with a birthday before his own. We figured it might be tough on him. At the age of 4 he wouldn't understand why she gets to have her birthday first. So we did an over the top carnival party for his 4th birthday. The next year I convinced Joey to let Kendall share a party with him. What theme do you do for a boy and a girl? Monkeys! since they are ones!. The worked out great! Well for her 3rd birthday I decided a low key princess party would work nicely. About 5 girls came over dressed up and it was nice to have such a small gathering. We did the big family BBQ thing for Joey's that year. Two parties is still a lot to deal with in such a short span. Last year I tried to talk them into a joint party again...but they were both adamant about separate ones. For the first time ever, I gave up some control and offered them the option to hold their party outside of the house. Kendall did not want to, but Joey did. he chose gymnastics. It was heaven to not have to clean my house before and after his party. I loved that party! So this year, I nudged them both in the direction of a joint, outside the house party. They agreed on Bowling...yes, that wasn't too hard! Bowling was also the least expensive of the choices I gave them. Unfortunately Joey only had one friend show up and Kendall had two and cousin Kaylie also came. So it was a pretty quiet and I must say well behaved group of 6 kids. They had a blast. most had never bowled before, including Kendall. You just gotta love bumpers. I grew up in a bowling family and way back when I was there age, they didn't have light balls, or small sized shoes or bumpers...what a change of an experience I could have had. I also always make the cake...I pride myself in a themed cake. I'm not good at it, but I want to do it anyhow. This year I was going to do bowling ball looking cupcakes. The night before I was sick and the thought of one more task was daunting. I begrudgingly took the kids to the store and let them pick out a store bought cake...this was very hard for me. At first I thought it was going to be very hard for them to agree on a cake...Kendall wanted the one with flowers...of course that wasn't Joey's style...he wanted the super, all chocolate one. Once we told him the flower cake was chocolate, he agreed....too easy! So I hope next year's party (and I say that singular)...will go just as well :)

Monday, September 21, 2009

What's New?

Well I'm so not motivated to work today...well, I guess I haven't been for a while now. I feel bad...I shouldn't slack so much. I mean I get done what needs to be done...but I could be doing more. Today, I feel like crap...again...what's new? Sore throat, barfy, headache...wha wha, whoa is me :)
So right now I'm in the midst of getting my house ready for sale...it is going VERY slow...I still don't even have one room completely painted. My goal was to have it on the market today...ha, not gonna happen. I hate that I was sick this weekend...cause I had a whole day yesterday that I could have devoted to packing/painting/etc. I severely needed to do laundry too...I hate getting behind! and now I'm behind on top of being behind... frown! Oh well, I keep telling myself...just plug away...don't look at the big picture.
I leave a week from today to go to Wisconsin again. Why can't we have plants in Florida or New York...or somewhere more exciting? Not that I get to see anything besides the airport, hotel and plant anyway. So this trip is for more training. For Food Safety Audits. I know you are super jealous that I get to go to Wisconsin and learn about Audits...it just doesn't get more exciting than that! The next training will take me to either Texas of San Diego...so that's a little more exciting. I'm going to be gone between 3-4 days...makes for a long week. It basically takes a day to get there with the time change. I am excited to meet some people that I talk to and email and never have met. It's nice to put a face with a name. So far I've been pretty off with the pictures I have come up with in my mind of what I think they will look like.
So that is pretty much what's new!

Thursday, September 10, 2009

I've neglected the blog! I've had a lot to say and share...but didn't know where to start or where to get the motivation. The last 3 years have been a very hard struggle in many ways...mentally, physically, emotionally...etc. I am thankful that at the start of it all I felt God's presence. I felt him say this is supposed to be happening and you will come out a happier, stronger person. I thought I knew exactly what God meant. I'm still a little confused about the way things seem to be heading...it's not what I thought he was showing me. But then, as humans, we have free will...and at some point the vision I had was blurred...by my actions? outside force? I don't know...but what I do know is that during this time, my relationship with God has grown stronger and more fruitful. I've learned tons about myself. I know that eventually I will regain the parts of me I have lost.
I'm in overwhelmed mode right now. This summer we had all decided to move away...out of state. So we started to pack up non-essentials, purge, paint. We started off gung-ho but the motivation quickly faded. I saw life going in the wrong direction...I saw that as much as I wanted to steer in one direction, that was not the way we were heading. Tons of praying, thinking, planning...let to very difficult decisions. The outcome of these decisions have left me still moving (although just here in town), still packing, purging and painting...except now I'm doing it by myself....no pity needed (although I'll take a little...lol). I feel like if I could stop time or take a week off, I could get caught up...but I can't...and as hard as I work at it, I'm just not close. This frustrates me to no end...cause I know I can do it...or I think I can. Anyway, I just want to be settled...not be a month behind on EVERYTHING. I want to have time to do things I like to do. Seems like my weekends consist of chores and kids activities. I don't mine either...but all the time...is wearing. I have so many things I want to do. I have a secret project that I want to finish, of course scrapbooking (I'm years behind), take dance classes, workout, go out with friends, start making Christmas gifts and cards....so many things. I know the time will come...and when it does, I pray I have regained my health and can actually take advantage of the opportunity. No matter what I know that I'm seriously blessed with what I do have. Sometimes I can't believe how well my life has turned out even with all the crap. I mean how can I complain when I have food to eat everyday, a house...with a bed, 2 healthy and amazing children...a great job with the best boss in the world...I could go on. I'm tired, I hurt, but most of all I am happy with me. I don't think a lot of people get to say that. I think I'm very lucky to be in that place with myself...could be the 10 years of therapy...hmmmm .... lol :)

Saturday, August 8, 2009



Saturday night I heard this loud crash. It sounded like a car crashed right into my house. I was home alone of course. I was scared to look out the window. I opened the door and I couldn't see anything. I did notice that Ryan's white Bug seemed to only be showing a little...hmm strange. I searched for a flashlight and shined it on the car....yep a huge branch fell on it. Now when I say huge branch...I mean the branch is the size of a tree. I didn't really know the extent of it until the next morning when I could see it in the day light. I walked it around it and I could barely see through the branches to the car. I could see that the windshield was shattered and there was a big dent in the roof. I didn't get to talk to Ryan for 2 days after it happened (he was camping on the coast). I had to leave town for business before he got back...so I didn't get to see his reaction to the scene once he saw it. When I got back the Insurance guy was here...at least the tree was not on our property. The boys have been chopping at it now to clear away the car.

Minnesooo tah!

So I just spent 4 days in Minnesota. Flew out Tuesday from Sacramento. I drove from Redding to Sac with my sis and boss. He was glad to be the one not driving for once and he actually got to return some emails. We boarded our plane and then sat there, half hour passes, an hour passes, two hours pass...then they get the okay to take off...ugh! By now, I'm hungry..cause it's way past lunch. 3 hours later we arrive in Minneapolis. Check in at the Double Tree and gladly accept our warm chocolate chip cookies. We meet 3 of our Illinois co-workers and head out to dinner. I was starving now...It was 8 o'clock their time. We walked 2 or 3 blocks to an Italian restaurant. It was so yummy. We talked forever...I seriously thought I was going to fall asleep. At one point my Il. boss asked if we had any questions... I said, "can we got to bed now?" My sarcasm did not produce the response i was hoping for as our conversation lasted another eon. We got back to the hotel and it is now like 11pm. I fight to get my computer online...I've really got to get the wireless on my laptop fixed...what a big pain in the butt to not have that. Then I crashed in bed for the night...I love the Double Tree and there 5 pillows and down comforters. The weather there was perfect! Had to meet the team at 7am for a quick breakfast and then on to Target headquarters at 7:30am. Thank goodness their office was right across the street. About an hour into the meeting I seriously thought I was going to fall asleep. I didn't get enough sleep and I was all messed up with the two hour loss. But I made it til lunch. Lunch was a boxed lunch...but our Ill. boss suggested we try out the employee cafeteria. Holy Cow! It was HUGE and looked like a mall food court. You could seriously get any kind of food there (pizza, hamburgers, sandwiches, salad,and on and on). It was really good! The rest of the day was filled with 40 minute meetings with Target and just our company. Apparently they Love us! They think we do a wonderful job...this makes me feel very proud since I actually had a part in that. It's funny that 2nd largest retailer of that type loved us that much...that they even knew who this little company I work for is. I left with tons of knowledge and finding that I will most likely be making two more business trips soon somewhere in the US. I need to become FDA Label certified and GFSI Practitioner certified (doesn't that sound muy exciting?!)...but will make for a nice change from everyday life. Right after the meeting my boss had to jet to the airport to catch a flight back to Sac, where his wife picked him up and then they flew to Hawaii...um...yep...jealous! The rest of our crew met with our broker for dinner. I had one martini...I swear it was just pure alcohol...wow! We got back to the hotel and I was conked out by 8:30. Another early morning, getting ready to meet Amy (one of our Illinois co-workers) for breakfast and then taxi ride to the MALL OF AMERICA (insert the sound of singing angels here). BTW, a 20 minute cab right is $40...thankfully my job paid for it. We arrived at the mall with a few minute of wait time before it opened. We had to hit Archiver's first (that is a huge scrapbook store in case you didn't know). We wanted to see how much we would spend there first so we would know how much to budget for the rest of the mall (wouldn't be so nice to not have to shop on a budget?). My sis tells Amy we will be about a half an hour if she wants to shop somewhere else...poor Amy...we were in there for 2 hours....and I thought I was going through there fast. I spent about twice as much as I wanted to...oh well....it was vacation at this point and you know that calories and spending don't count when you are on vacation. Luckily I really didn't buy much the rest of the time...although we saw lots of neat things...I kept thinking..."do i really need that?" and the answer was no the majority of the time. I had fun buying stuff for Kendall's birthday at the Disney store...got her the cutest Hannah Montana costume for more than 50% off. I could have dropped serious money in that store for her...but I was good. We had to say goodbye to Amy around 2pm as she had to drive back to Chicago with the rest of the Ill. crew. I loved hanging out with her...it's funny how you talk on the phone with someone all the time and you've never met them...it's nice to have faces with names and voices now. Vicki and I then went and checked out Nickelodeon Universe (the theme park in the middle of the mall). It was impressive! A lot of the rides were insane though...they looked scarier then most of the rides I have seen. You'd think a Nickelodeon amusement park would be more low key than that. We met Dora and Sponge Bob & Patrick....so bummed I didn'thave my kids with me. We went to an all Sponge Bob store...I wanted to buy my kids everything! But I settled for some neat cups and personalized spongebob dog tag necklaces. I was excited to find one that said "joey"...they usually say Joe or Joseph. Of course they didn't have Kendall...but they had Princess...so that worked...they loved them and are still wearing them and drinking from the cups. I also could have spent a fortune on Kendall in the Hello Kitty store and a fortune on Joey in the Lego store. The Lego store was incredible...cause it wasn't inside a normal store. It was out in the open and it was inside of a Lego structure, with Dinosaurs made out of Legos along one side. I wish Joey could have seen it...I took lots of pictures for him and when he saw them he pretended to faint. The mall is 4 stories tall and is like a mile long. ...and yes we trekked the majority of the first 3 floors (the 4th floor is the sit down restaurants I guess). There was all sorts of speciality stores in there: Tap out (UFC), all socks, all swimsuits, all magnets, all flipflops, QVC, all personalized....lots of fun stuff. By about 4/5 o'clock my feet hurt soooo bad. We found the sketchers store and I bought a pair of squishy flip flops...that did help...however, my feet have never hurt sooo bad before by the end of the night. We saw the NASCAR simulator place and I thought...hmmm, Vicki needs to do this..aka...I can sit and let my feet rest. Here's a big surprise...she drove car 24! We literally shopped until we dropped! The stores close around 9 and the last shuttle to our hotel was leaving at 9:50. So close to 9 Vicki finally let me eat and at a sit down restaurant. We had to chow down super fast as we were on the opposite side of the mall as we needed to be for the shuttle. Oh BTW, when Amy left we walked her out and found lockers...we so needed them as our scrapbook stuff had to weigh like 20lbs. Thank GOD for those lockers. We got to our shuttle with time to spare. We trekked the LOOONG route to our hotel room (they put us on the opposite side from the front of the hotel). With the weight of our bags, the pain in my feet and legs, and the fatigue from the day; i thought I'd never make it to the room...then we were like..."which room are we in again?" I guessed right. We were right about the inground pool, so we decided to hit the hot tub to relax our sore bodies. We planted our feet next to the jets and tried to relax. It was after midnight by the time I got to bed. We had to be in the hotel lobby at 7:30 the next morning to catch our shuttle to the airport....TOO EARLY...my body (especially my feet and legs) hurt so bad and our bags were double heavy now too. Walking through the airport was torture! At least this time our flight left after we bored. I was too excited to drive 2+ hours back home once we landed in Sac. Well just writing about this trip has exhausted me. I'm looking forward to relaxing the rest of tonight and tomorrow before I go back to the chaos of work Monday morning...a week gone will equal LOTS of work to be done.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

I have just been so moved. Dancing is an amazing gift. When I dance; my heart pours out. It feels so wonderful to express myself through movement. I don't dance enough! I miss it terribly! Today, I watched this dance from the show, "So you think you can dance" I had to share it...so amazing... you can feel thier emotions. The dance is about long time friends who want each other, but it's not the right time. Please watch and be amazed: (the song is "If it kills me" by Jason Mraz..I'll post the lyrics after the video)



Are you moved?

Hello, tell me you know
Yeah, you figured me out
Something gave it away
And it would be such a beautiful moment
To see the look on your face
To know that I know that you know now

And baby that's a case of my wishful thinking
You know nothing
Cause you and I
Why, we go carrying on for hours, on and
We get along much better
Than you and your boyfriend

Well all I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me

Well how long, can I go on like this,
Wishing to kiss you,
Before I rightly explode?
This double life I lead isn't healthy for me
In fact it makes me nervous
If I get caught I could be risking it all

Baby there's a lot that I miss
In case I'm wrong

Well all I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me

If I should be so bold
I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hand
Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man
But I never said a word
I guess I'm gonna miss my chance again

All I really wanna do is love you
A kind much closer than friends use
But I still can't say it after all we've been through
And all I really want from you is to feel me
As the feeling inside keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me
If it kills me
I think it might kill me

And all I really want from you is to feel me
It's a feeling inside that keeps building
And I will find a way to you if it kills me
If it kills me
If it kills me
It might kill me


I can't stop thinking about dances I've seen that I have just loved...so I am added links to some more.
She has just found out she is expecting
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bGF78f4UOjk

I believe this is a about a husband who keeps leaving on "business trips"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWoqeF331-s

He is going off to war
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I_zftfeD2cU

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

This and That

Life seems so crazy right now but peaceful. How can that be? My family and I are going through so many changes...scary changes that I'm not that scared about. Besides the advenures of my gymnastic days of flipping off anything I could find, I'm not advernturous. I like safety, what I k now and total control. I don't like the feeling of roller coasters, I have no desire to bungee jump and I don't even like to drive fast. But I need an adventure...I need some excitement after such a dark past few years. I'm sad to leave some behind, but I'm not worried that they will be just fine without me. Plus it will give them a reason to go on a trip to visit (hint). I'm hoping that between now and then I learn the skill to talk less and listen more, to not be such an open book, and be more go with the flow. That's a tall order...but I'm gonna try.


I want to thank those who have given me hope...sparked feeling back into me...rallied for me to get back to living. Thank you to all my online buddies...I love chatting with you...it's so freeing...and I feel tons of support that way...I hope to see you all and not just be cyber buddies...Some of you were my best friends at once (so many fun times)...how'd I'd love to relive those times!


Mostly I'm thankful for this darn computer...I love that I can google anything I have a question about, shop, chat, play, keep in touch, do business, bank...seriously an amazing invention. I always think of the scene from "Blast from the Past" when the guy says he'll check something on his computer and Brendon Frazier says, "you have a computer? in your house?" Imagine what they thought in the 50's...no wonder our elders don't understand us...I remember having to go to the library to research papers for school. Funny!

-out-

Saturday, July 4, 2009

The Next Survivor Series

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks.

Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes.

There is no fast food.

Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, and complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money.

In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.

Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time--no emailing.

Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment.

He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care.

He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.

Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times.

The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done.

The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep fingernails polished and eyebrows groomed.

During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties.

They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.

They will need to read a book to the kids each night and in the morning,
feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair by 7:00 am.

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink,
favorite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up.

The kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.

If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years eventually earning the right to be called Mother!

*I did not write this, but found it very funny! To my male readers, I'm sure this does not pertain to you of course!

Saturday, June 27, 2009

20 years ago...

....dang...how am I even old enough to say that?
I don't remember who I was talking to, but just the other day I was having the "high school dork" conversation with someone. My name is Lisa and I was a Dork in high school...okay, who are we kidding? I'm still a DORK!
So this blog is for those who didn't know me in high school.
I'm 14, 4'8" maybe around 75lbs and it's my time to start high school. I'm about a size 10/12 in the kids section. Redding had't quite gotten around to carrying size 0's or 1's in the junior's section yet. So I'm stuck in the kids section. Jeans are super uncomfortable for some reason....so stretch pants are all I can wear. So I'm a kid's clothes, stretch pants wearing dork...lol! I still don't need a bra (sorry male readers). I'm a 14 year old in a 9 year old body. And for reasons, I have yet to understand, I felt a need to wear a matching bow clip in my hair with every outfit. I also had a need to match, match and then match some more. I just broke out in the cold sweats at the memory of these outfits! okay, to paint the picture for you I must describe the outfit I wore on my first day of high school.
Cotton knit white shirt with navy blue polka dots (large ones). On top of the shoulders the shirt laced with navy blue ribbon (I know...and I haven't barely gotten started describing). The skirt was also knit. The first layer (yes, I said layer) was the same white with navy blue polka dots (remember...it has to match), the next layer....navy blue with white polka dots, and the third, white with blue polka dots again. Awww how cute!...but wait, there's more! There was white bicycle shorts (well that's what we called them back then) with white lace trim (this is so you didn't show any goodies to the boys). And just in case i still wasn't dorky enough I also wored navy blue lace tights....and.... a matching bow in my hair. I feel a tightness in my chest recalling this look. This wasn't an abnormal look for me either. The knit outfits were frequent...pattern on pattern....bow on head.
And somehow my husband fell in love with that.
This is the part where I would post a picture...but these pictures have mysteriously disappeared....lol!

Friday, June 26, 2009

Song of the Day

I played this song 3 times on the way into work today. I wouln't normally use the term "Bitch" to describe myself, however, when this song comes on it feels like my theme song:

.....I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one
Im a bitch, Im a lover, Im a child, Im a mother
Im a sinner, Im a saint, I do not feel ashamed
Im your hell, Im you dream, Im nothing in between
.....So take me as I am....and dont try to save me.....
when youre hurt, when you suffer
Im your angel undercover
Ive been numb, Im revived,Cant say Im not alive
You know I wouldnt want it any other way

Click it, then turn it up!!! http://www.jango.com/music/Meredith+Brooks?l=0

Embrace your Bitch today....LOL! BTW, Bitch just means standing up for yourself, knowing who you are and not taking crap....I believe men are described as strong and confident when doing the same thing.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

For my stampers!!!

Here is a sneak peak at the new catty: Click to see full size image :)

New Chapter

Today a new chapter starts. The last 3 years have brought many changes to my family's lives. We have been in the unknown for a long time. We have struggled physically and emotionally and had many ups and downs. Today was the day. The day that something had to change. A new adventure. Some ideas have been thrown out there, one that has me excited, but only God knows. Whatever direction we're taken in will take us out of our comfort zone. It will require faith in God, strength and perseverance. God has been amazing to me...enveloped me with his compassion...made me realize that putting my life in his hands makes this life worth it. My life could have gone another way, a path that I would wish I never took. But after a life of struggling to give up control...I finally did. I found that letting Go and letting God is an amazing gift. I've unfortunately lost a lot of loved ones on this journey, a causality that I do not take lightly, for reasons I may never know. But I know God has something glorious waiting for me. He will reward my genuine heart, my desire to serve others and my passion to live a life worthy to be known as one of his children.

God,
I pray that you will lead me to a place where I can feel accepted and loved. A place that will bind my family in your strength. I pray that someday I will understand the trials I have been through and the reasons that I was not wanted by this place. I pray that you will give peace to those I love, who hurt so much. I pray you give them wisdom through their struggles and a bright light to lead them in your direction. You're an Amazing God and all who feel your presence are blessed. To you I am thankful and to you I praise. May I honor your name in my faithfulness.
Amen!

Psalm 86:15
But you, O Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

God Bless Scrapbooking!

This Saturday I had the privilege to go to an all day crop (15 hours). In my world that is equal to heaven :) The crop theme was Fourth of July. They gave us a kit with papers, stickers and die cuts. They had a contest for the best layout made from the contents of the kit. At 5 o'clock we entered our pages (anonymously). They set them out on a table and numbered them. Then all the attendees voted for their favorite (about 10 entries and 30 voters). Usually when I see all the layouts, I have a pretty good idea if I have a chance at winning. There were so many good layouts that I honestly did not think I'd win. Later that evening they announced the winner...and it was me! Yoo Hoo! I won a $25 gift card to Starbucks. Now I won't have to feel guilty for the next 5 coffees. Wow, I just realized how sad that is that I can only get like 5 or 6 coffees with $25....what a rip! The layout is to the left.

The rest of the day was so fun. I sat in between two duos of scrappers. On one side was best friends with kids Joey's age....they were funny and spunky. I really enjoyed talking with them. On the other side was a girl younger than me with her mother in law. They were also very nice. I like getting to know new people. I had a pretty productive day and I felt very creative! Here are the other layouts I did:





*The first two layouts are of our first camping trip in our travel trailer last summer. The 3rd layout is Kendall riding her bike in her ballerina tu-tu....that is sooo Kendall!

Awhile back I got a one-page kit. I always do 2 page layouts so I did the other half yesterday too. Now it just needs pictures. I really like how it turned out.


And to top off the evening.....I pulled out onto Cypress at a little past midnight. I think I was the only car on the road. I rounded the corner onto S. Market...I swerved a little...and then noticed the cop behind me. I knew he'd pull me over and ask me if I had been drinking...lol....and he did. I am sure he was disappointed when I told him I had just been crafting for 15 hours and I was just tired. Thankfully he sent me on my way with no ticket. Ironically, earlier in the day the girls and I were swapping "Pulled Over" stories....My never being pulled over by the cops (just by a park ranger once), is now something I can't say. Too Funny!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Ransom

I have this big fear that people won't read my blog, won't come to my funeral and now won't pay my ransom if I get kidnapped. I'm watching the season premier of "Weeds" (who doesn't love a pot dealing mom?). One of the characters is held hostage and they show the guy calling everyone she knows demanding they pay her ransom or he kills her. Everyone who answers makes some smart ass comment and hangs up... no one would pay it and no one seemed to care that she was going to die. Please tell me that someone would pay my ransom!

Monday, June 8, 2009

Trash the Dress


A while back I wanted to practice my photography skillz, so my friend Natalie and I went near the downtown mall and shot photos in an alley. When we were almost done a girl comes walking by in a hooker like racing outfit. We asked her where she was coming from and she said a photo shoot underneath "Need to Speed". She said they had all these hot cars and that there was a photography workshop going on. So Natalie and I high tail it down to the underground parking lot to find the scene that the girl had just described. We asked if they minded if I shot Natalie with the cars. They were just finishing up and they didn't mind...in fact they all flocked to Natalie (she's 6', hot and had crazy makeup on). We probably spent an hour there...it was so fun! I found out that this guy Mark Behrens holds these workshops to help photographers learn more. I was so excited to have stumbled upon this. I couldn't wait to take one of his workshops (which I have yet to do). So this last weekend he was having a "Trash the Dress" workshop at Brandy Creek. What this means is a female wears her wedding dress in the water. Sounds lame, but is really beautiful. My friend had done one of these shoots before as the model. The pictures were so neat and I wanted it to do it too. I unfortunately can't fit into my dress at present time, nor would I want to ruin it. Mark has some wedding dresses for the models. But I figured I'd see if I could borrow my friends' dress and she was very nice to lend it to me. Modeling is a lot harder than it looks. I hurt all over! Squatting, tilting my head, arching my back and holding it....did I mention I was in the freezing cold water at Brandy Creek?So anyway...here are a few pics....I'll post more when the photographers post them.